Five Star Review For Stormwreck

Just received another five star review for STORMWRECK on amazon.co.uk

It really is an amazing one and  I am very grateful to the reviewer.

"This book is one of the best I have read this year. It is the sort of book that builds page after page & very quickly you not only feel you know the characters but you are transported to Cornwall with it's beautiful coastline.
The book is a tale of the Supernatural but does not go beyond the bounds of reality, it is quite a long read but unlike many novels of this length it does not loose it's way half way through & you find that your heart is in your mouth for most of the story. I do hope that Mr Humphries will be writing more novels in this genre as he is so talented & it would be a gerat shame if he didn't treat us to another wonderfully dark tale in the future.
I can't praise Stormwreck enough, if you haven't read it yet then do so, it would be such a shame not to read such a wonderfully written story that will keep you happy for hours & leave you wanting more from this talented author."

Five star review for THE GREAT ROCK N ROLL DOOMSDAY TOUR

Just got a five star review on Amazon for The Great Rock N Roll Doomsday Tour. Considering that this has bee available free on Smashwords for a while now, I am disappointed by the number of reviews that have been left. This one makes up for that, however.

 

 

5.0 out of 5 stars Brilliant humour, 12 Dec 2011

This review is from: The Great Rock N Roll Doomsday Tour (Kindle Edition)

Darren Humphries has recently become my favourite author of humorous stories. Again, he has produced another rollicking good funny story. The opening chapter sets the tone. Hilarious! Read the sample and you'll see what I mean. You'll want the rest of the book as the laughs don't stop.

Five Star Review for the first MAN FROM U.N.D.E.A.D. book

The Man From U.N.D.E.A.D. - The Curious Case of the Kidnapped Chemist  received the following five star review from Ignite, so thanks for posting.

"This is an action packed adventure in a world which is shot through with magic, alien creatures and mythological beings from which we are protected by an agency - U.N.D.E.A.D. The story is narrated by Ward, a likeable and self-deprecating agent and the plot is full of twists and turns. It's an exciting and fast moving story and full of humour. It's not the belly laugh, slapstick type but is clever and subtle, using word-play and wonderful, memorable phrases, the sort of humour I much prefer. I am relatively new to Darren Humphries' work and he grows on me with each book. I was delighted to find, at the end of this, that there's a sequel. I now understand there is a whole series planned - Bring it on! "

Four Star Review for To Infinity (and maybe that's far enough)

The latest review for my comic space opera is short but sweet, so thanks to Walrus for posting it.

"A rollicking good space yarn. Well told and written(apart from a few errors),this is a fun,action-packed,pacey story,which I enjoyed immensely."

This was re-upped with what I believed all the errors to have been removed. Will have to have another look, but at least it's not spoiling people's enjoyment.

Goodreads Gallimaufrey

A GOODREADS GALLIMAUFERY is a collection of short stories, poetry, real life accounts and recipes culled from the participants of the UK Amazon Kindle Forum on Goodreads.

I have got a couple of short stories included THE PERFECT GIFT and SUPER RICH PATENT ATTORNEY BRUTALLY BATTERS IMPOVERISHED INVENTOR included in the collection.

Five Star Review for NEW YORK CITY LEGEND

Ever since I was accused of 'casual racism' in a review of this book on Goodreads, I've been waiting for a new review to see if others thought so (previous reviewers having not mentioned it).

That review is in and it's a lovely 5 star one that also makes no mention of it, so I'm not going to obsess over it. Honest.

5.0 out of 5 stars An engaging book, 21 Nov 2011

 

This review is from: New York City Legend (Kindle Edition)

This book was a true fantasy and a delightful idea, well executed. Magic exist still in the heart of New York (I think it exists in some form everywhere if you have the right outlook) and is endangered by hard-nosed businessmen engaging in shady deals. It is said that, for evil to thrive, it is only necessary for good men to do nothing. Ben Darkly is a good man and he is not prepared to stand back and see something wonderful destroyed without a fight.
The plot is active, engaging and in places, quite tense. I was gripped by the book and enjoyed it very much. No-one with a heart could do otherwise.

Five Star review for STORMWRECK

STORMWRECK has been pretty much one of the least noticed of my books, not least because it is so unlike any of the other stuff that I have done. It's a bit like the comedy stars saying that they want to be serious actors. They might be good at making us laugh, but can they make us take them seriously?

Well this review might give an answer.

5.0 out of 5 stars Unputdownability!, 10 Nov 2011

By 

Ignite  (East Yorkshire, UK)

This review is from: Stormwreck (Kindle Edition)

Darren Humphries is best known for his funny fantasy books but looking through his titles this one leapt out as being something very different. I liked the product description so I bought it. I am SO glad I did. It is a supernatural thriller, serious, clever, exciting - I can't praise it enough. It's fast paced and by 40% I was on the edge of my chair, biting my fingers! By 50% it felt like the climax had been reached. I wondered how he could keep the tension up for the second half of the book. He didn't. He increased it, ratcheted it up gradually. What a story!

This is certainly far from the author's usual genre but I sincerely hope he will take this direction again. He has hidden depths. Don't continue to hide them Mr Humphries - lets have more of your serious, dark side!

The Sword In The Tree Four Star Review on Goodreads

This review was recently posted on Goodreads:

Read from November 01 to 08, 2011

This is a lovely book, quite silly but a very nice read from an author with a charming sense of humour. The Arthurian legends have never been told this way before! Who realised that Arthur, instead of being concerned with The Matter Of Britain, was obsessed with his shirt collection? Launcelot was a craven coward until be came good towards the end of the book. The evil, scheming Mordred is really a little sweetie and the shame and despair of his conniving mother, Morgan le Fey. These and other characters are bound together by Barnaby, an unwilling visitor from our time. I felt it got a little rambly in the marshes (that sounds like a village name?) but the ending was excellent. It's my first Darren Humphreys book and is certainly not going to be my last.

Fantastic Way to Spend Some Time - Five Star Review For The Great Rock N Roll Doomsday Tour

The Great Rock N Roll Doomsday Tour just received a five star review on Amazon. Since this is one of the books to have received the least interest, much to my surprise(I was wondering if it was the title), it is nice to know that someone appreciates it.

The review:

5.0 out of 5 stars  

Fantastic Way to Spend Some Time, October 30, 2011

Basically I read to escape from life, from its mundaneness, its stress and all its other annoyances...
This book was absolutely perfect to escape into... amazingly colourful characters and a twisty, turny, convoluted (but perfectly followable) storyline peppered with amusing comparisons left me laughing out loud on more than one occasion...
A gem of a book which is totally delightful but doesn't take itself too seriously. i am off to seek out more of this guy's stuff...

A stonking great romp of a book! - New Five Star Review

This review of To Infinity (and maybe that's far enough) was recently placed on Amazon.co.uk

I couldn't have asked for a better endorsement. I really must get back to the sequel.

A stonking great romp of a book!, 22 Oct 2011

This review is from: To Infinity (and maybe that's far enough) (Kindle Edition)

This book slammed me straight on the funny bone. Some books cry out to have bits memorised so you can throw out quotes at appropriately humorous moments in your life. This is such a book.

Ebooks I have read - Learn Me Good

Learn Me Good by John Pearson

My rating: 1 of 5 stars


A man who apparently doesn't like kids, schools or teaching takes it up after he's made redundant and then whinges throughout about the kids that he exhibits as freaks to the audience.

Whilst distasteful, it is more importantly not funny and really rather dull.



View all my reviews

Ebooks I have read - Snuff

Snuff by Terry Pratchett

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


OK, I think Terry Pratchett is the UK's funniest writer and the best purveyor of comic fantasy ever.

His last few books have been a step down from his best (though he is never less than perfectly readable), but SNUFF takes him back into the world of Sam Vimes, head of the Ankh-Morpork Watch and this has brought the best out of him again.

Yes, the plot is slight, but then plots aren't what Terry Pratchett is about. The cast of characters are endearing, the dialogue is witty, the descriptions are hilarious and there is plenty of action. His view of the countryside is touchingly old-fashioned, but then this is the Discworld.

It's easy to rattle through this book, but it's also worth taking the time to savour the word play and it is a book that will no doubt be revisited.



View all my reviews

Ebooks I have read - Milking The Rhino

Milking the Rhino: Dangerously Funny Lists by Chris Rush


My rating: 1 of 5 stars



Lists can be funny, I'm sure of it, but this book doesn't prove it.

There aren't any laughs in it and it's main benefit is that it's mercifully short.





View all my reviews

The Sci Fi Freak's Guide To The Televisual Galaxy is updated!

THE SCI FI FREAK'S GUIDE TO THE TELEVISUAL GALAXY has been updated to its second edition for the kindle and in print.

It's been just about a year since the first version appeared on the scene and since that point I've been working on the new edition.

In the print version that means more than 80 more pages of new stuff.

The kindle version update has been even more radical with the inclusion of an active table of contents and active links through the text. This was a major reformatting task that nearly sent me insane on far more than one occasion, but now that it's done it should be easier for next year's iteration.

New entries include:

Alice
Bedlam
Camelot
The Deep
The Event
Firestarter Rekindled
First Men In The Moon
Game Of Thrones
The Golden Years
Haven
The Invaders (1995)
Invasion: Earth
Jake 2.0
The Knights Of God
No Ordinary Family
Outcasts
Pathfinders in space
Pathfinders to Mars
Pathfinders to Venus
Special Unit 2
The Uninvited
Walking Dead
Whistle and I’ll Come To You (1968)
Whistle and I'll Come To You (2010)
Wild Palms
New seasons have been added to:

Being Erica
Being Human
Caprica
Chuck
Fringe
Ghost Whisperer
Medium
Misfits
Primeval
Sanctuary
Sarah Jane Adventures
Stargate Universe
True Blood
V 2009
The Vampire Diaries
Warehouse 13

and the following entries have been expanded and enhanced:

A For Andromeda 1961
Alien Nation
Come Back Mrs Noah
Farscape
Life On Mars USA
Moonbase 3
Mutant X
Painkiller Jane
Quatermass Experiment 1953
Quatermass 2
Quatermass And The Pit
Saving Grace
V 1983
V The Final Battle
Witchblade

I'm very pleased with the result, but the printed copy is getting close to Lulu's size limits and I might have to look at font sizes and things for next year.

Anyway to get it on the kindle click the links

Amazon (UK)
Amazon (US)
Lulu.com (printed)

Five Star Review For To Infinity (And Maybe that's far enough)

Recently relaunched with a table of contents and (hopefully) the last few typos killed off TO INFINITY (and maybe that's far enough) received a new review yesterday and it's a nice five star one as well.


Really enjoyable read, 6 Oct 2011

I enjoyed this - a lot! It's one of those stories that begs to be read in a sitting once you've been sucked in, and it's an antidote to many of those po-faced sci-fi books.
Our hero, Kaymer Haynes, is suitably disreputable, and established as a Man To Be Reckoned With during the first few pages as he escapes an inescapable prison.
A story that romps along, good characters and plenty of humour make for a really good read. I shall read more by Darren Humphries.

Another five star review

I noticed a new five star review on Amazon.co.uk today.

Headed "A Very Enjoyable Read" it said

"Well, it started well, if a bit over the top, but settled down into a cracking good read. I found it funny and unpredictable, right to the very end. Well worth a read, and I will look for more from this writer, thats for sure."

This is the kind of comment that has made me think that it was worthwhile putting my books onto the kindle in the first place.

Man From U.N.D.E.A.D. now available in print

After all the formatting and checking and cover artwork and everything else, the printed versions of The Man From U.N.D.E.A.D. - The Curious Case of the Kidnapped Chemist is now available in printed form.

The hardbacked version is available exclusively from lulu.com whilst the paperback version can either be bought from either lulu.com or from Amazon.com.

Now I'm On Kindlegraph

There's this site called Kindlegraph.com where readers of books (no, you don't need to read e-books or own a kindle, though those are the obvious targets for this) can send a request for a dedication from the author of a book. This is sent to them as a pdf including the cover of the book in question and whatever dedication that the author has seen fit to make.

At the request of a reader, I've added myself to this, though I have no expectations of anyone else wanting it.

It's just another example of the possibilities of e-books and e-readers.

Ebooks I have read - Goodbye Mr Chips

Yes, I'm on a James Hilton kick at the moment. This is the review that I just posted on Goodreads.

"This is a short book, a gentle book and a great book.

In a very short time and space, James Hilton introduces us to a man, an unexceptional man, and makes us care for him so much that if you're not in tears at least a couple of times before the end then you need to consult a cardiologist to make sure that your heart hasn't been removed.

This is great writing in the service of a touching tale that, no matter how small, is no small matter."

Ebooks I have read

Lost Horizon is one of the most remarkable books I have ever read. It is a discussion of a delightful philosophy and an examination of the inner workings of an exceptional man all framed in the pretence of an adventure novel.

The real triumph of Lost Horizon, though, is in the way that Hilton weaves the spell of Shangri-La on the reader even as he is detailing the very spell that he is conjuring. The Lamasery in the book is the most relaxing place on the planet and the passages set there relax the reader wonderfully, except for the jarring interruptions of the character Mallinson, who is meant to be jarring.

There is a reason why this story has been so lasting, why Shangri-La is a name memorable for more than the many B&Bs it has given name to, and why the musical film of the 70s is such a horror and that is that this book is a book about the soul, about the mind, about the heart and about the yearning for peacefulness.

In current times, it's a book I keep returning to and continually feel restored afterwards.

(The Ronald Colman film version is also sublime)

For the kindle, it can be found on the australian project gothenburg site and downloaded as a webpage to be transferred to kindle for reading.

To Infinity (and maybe that's far enough) New review posted

The website www.starsandaliens.com has reviewed To Infinity (and maybe that's far enough) - I'm having to use the full title now since the sequel now has the title of To Infinity (and maybe just a bit further). It's good with a slight reservation, and here it is:

"Concept/World
The worlds on which To Infinity (and maybe that’s far enough) is set are imaginative and entertaining.  I particularly liked the floating palaces of Bliss 3.

Story
The plot moves along at a good pace with lots of adventurous action.  I liked the unexpected changes of direction and the way the plot developed.  I was a little disappointed by the twist at the end.  Twists that reframe the whole situation can strain credibility, particularly when you’re deeply involved in the story.

Characters
Kaymer Haynes is an interesting character, a con man with a sense of humour.  I found him very engaging, with a sense that there was always a lot more going on than he was letting on.  Other characters are lightly but effectively drawn.  I loved the stroppy computer and the bonkers Dennis Crump.

Presentation
There is an error in the book description; “ever copy” instead of “every copy”. There are similar grammar/punctuation errors in the book (I noted 13), such as “Huge blocks of plas-wrapped cargo was floating free”.   If small errors of this kind irritate you when reading then you may find that detracts from your enjoyment of the story.

Overall           
I was intrigued by the title of this story and slightly puzzled by the end of the book because it wasn’t clear why it was called that other than as a jokey take on “To Infinity and beyond”.  I enjoyed the humour and adventure in the story, and I liked the characters, too.  The first couple of chapters are brilliant and it is a very entertaining read.  If it hadn’t been for the imperfect proofreading and the credibility-straining twist at the end, I would have given this 5*."

First Man From UNDEAD review

The first Man From U.N.D.E.A.D. review was posted on Amazon.co.uk today.

It runs:

"Squid Gods, Sirens and Sex bombs - whats not to like?,

This is the latest instalment of fabulous fun from the amazing Darren Humphries! Well it is loads of fun - his books just keep getting better and better. This one reminds me of the old hard-boiled, wise-cracking American private eye books, but with futuristic technology and some decidedly un-earthly characters.
It starts off with a flash and a bang, and keeps on going until the end with lots more flashes and bangs. There are many twists and turns and unexpected revelations, and the whole thing is very satisfyingly absurd and exciting. There are dramatic deaths and betrayals - all the right ingredients for a truly tasty dish.
I am reliably informed that there is going to be a sequel to this book and I am already eagerly waiting for it. The world needs more of this insanity."

All of which is more than enought to make me blush.

First Review for The Great Rock N Roll Doomsday Tour

The Great Rock N Roll Doomsday Tour has been pretty much unregarded amongst the books that I've put onto Amazon and Smashwords. Maybe it's something to do with the title, or the cover or the blurb. I don't know.

Still, I finally got my first review for it on Amazon.co.uk

"If you like a good laugh read this.
Full of whacky characters like a gunman from a western, to the devil and a guardian angel who doesn't act very angelic!
Never a dull moment and I thoroughly enjoyed it.
A great romp and a bargain as well."

There is nothing better than knowing that someone liked what you've produced and I'll be able to float on this for a while.

Kindle final test not so easy

When it comes to self-publishing on Kindle it's pretty easy if you have any sort of computer literacy, but I've come across a slight glitch in the final step.

My latest book, The Man From U.N.D.E.A.D. - The Curious Case Of The Kidnapped Chemist had gone through all the various pre-checks and even the dtp online preview.

All I needed to do was to publish it, buy it and then unpublish it whilst I checked it out on my own kindle as a final check.

Unfortunately,  the system doesn't allow for that. The book was published and became available to download almost immediately, but on the dtp platform it is still marked as 'publishing' hours later and I am unable to upload a new version that deals with two very minor formatting issues that have somehow cropped up in the final dtp translation until whatever process that denotes is completed.

This is one of the few times that I am hoping that nobody notices the book until I can get the new file uploaded and the issues resolved.

Ebooks I have read - Stories I Only Tell My Friends by Rob Lowe

Stories I Only Tell My Friends

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Rob Lowe played Sam Seabourne in THE WEST WING and left after four seasons. My whole reason for buying this book was to find out why and I had to wait to the end to find out why. Before that, I had to get through his youth, his early attempts to break into acting, his early films and successes, the sex tape scandal (somewhat glossed over) and his drinking problems/rehab. Throughout the book, he is engaging, funny, entertaining and unapologetic, although as with most autobiographies there is more than a little 'it wasn't really my fault' going on.

There is more about his politics and his career than about his bedhopping and most of the stories are fun to share. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to have learned after reading it, but I'm off to rewatch all seven seasons of the best TV show ever (TM) THE WEST WING.

My Goodreads Reviews

Sword In The Tree Review

Just to balance out the one star review listed below, I'm adding the full text of one of the Amazon.co.uk reviews for The Sword In The Tree, just to show that not all my reviews are bad ones.

 

"5.0 out of 5 stars Great book, 11 Dec 2010

This review is from: The Sword In The Tree (Kindle Edition)

I've just finished this on my Kindle and am so glad I bought it.
It's a really funny book about a man who finds himself back in King Arthurs time and is trying to get back to the present. All the characters were written so well I felt I was in the story - a great bit of escapism.
The book is very well written and I will definately be buying more of this authors books if this is anything to go by.
At 72p it was a bargain as well. "

Just adding a note to point out that it's not 72p anymore.

First poor review

I received my first really poor review recently for New York City Legend. It was posted on Goodreads along with a one star rating and is added here in its entirety.

"A strangely dated book, set as it was in, at a guess, the 1990s. The plot centres around a magical realm populated by sprites and a unicorn that's enclosed within a portal on the 26th floor of an office block in New York. The office block is scheduled for demolition, and it's kind of up to Ben Darkly, a ridiculously bland vague-businessman-type-person to save the day. Kind of.

The plot didn't make a whole lot of sense, the romance was kind of token, at best, and the description of magic was very poor. Also, some amazingly casual racism (a character is referred to as 'the most attractive coloured woman he'd ever met'), and just a failure to seriously connect with any character central to the story made this an unrewarding read.

I think other authors have done Urban Fantasy better - notably Neil Gaiman's Neverwhere and Holly Black's Tithe/Valiant/Ironside trilogy."

I admit to being disappointed, especially with the comment about casual racism since that couldn't be further from my mind. Still, everyone's opinion is just as valid and so I repost it here.

It was also the first full length novel that I ever finished and I'm continuing to develop my style, so it's useful feedback.

New books available in paperback on Amazon.com

Others of my books are now available on Amazon.com in an attempt to stave off the silly advertising of Origin.

You can now get To Infinity (and maybe that's far enough), The Sword In The Tree, Stormwreck and New York City Legend all for prices that aren't even a tenth of the ridiculous asking price of the Origin listings.

It's only paperbacks that are listed, though. For the hardbacks you still have to go to www.lulu.com . I'd get the hardbacks listed as well but that $75 a shot and almost the price of buying one of the Origin books. Considering the amount that I sell, it really wouldn't be worth the effort.

If the paperbacks took off, however...

First sale on iBooks

New York City Legend is the first of my books that has been sold on the iBooks platform. I don't know who bought it or if there is more than one, but I did a check last night on iTunes and there was a 'people who bought this book also bought' listing which doesn't exist on any of the other books.

The iBooks listings are out of my control, having been made by lulu.com in conjuction with iBooks, but it's still a thrill to know that someone's taken the plunge on there.

Printed book on Amazon.com

In an attempt to stop anyone getting caught out by the people selling my books at outrageous markups, I've entered the two titles into the Lulu.com marketing scheme and they have now both gone live.

This means that people who order from amazon.com will be able to see and order the Sci Fi Freak's Guide To The Televisual Galaxy in printed form.

It's retailing at about $22 dollars which is better than the $150 dollar price tag that Origin have been quoting.

It's a shame that it doesn't also cover Amazon.co.uk. For UK readers you'd have to go to Lulu.com direct to order.

More Ebooks I Have Read

The Unwise Woman of Fuggis Mire


The Unwise Woman of Fuggis Mire is a spoof on all things fantasy and sets its stall out early with some quirky, fun characters who are all aware of their place within the plot (postmodern or what). There are plenty of good jokes and funny happenings, but somewhere along the line the plot gets misplaced and the plethora of characters just sort of wander around for a while until they finally all come together for a big non-ending. Then we get a second part that tries to make up for that and provide openings for a sequel.

Ebooks I Have Read

Since writing takes such a long time and the proofreading and editing that goes on after is even longer, the number of posts is likely to remain near to zero, so I will add posts regarding ebooks that I have read. This is the review that I left on Amazon for 42 - Douglas Adams' Amazingly Accurate Answer to Life, the Universe and Everything

"Let me first say that I'm a massive Douglas Adams fan and really wanted to like this book since the author was educated in Longridge from whence I also hail. Unfortunately, the long list of stuff that is linked to the number 42 in increasingly thin and fabricated ways (there are lots of 'almost', 'not far from' and 'nearly' 42s mentioned) gets tiresome and, as the author himself admits, seems to be a wikipedia trawl made print.
This is a shame because the book is almost saved by the bit towards the end where the author goes through the story of the birth of hitchhikers and 42 in particular and this bit gets all of the two stars that are awarded. More of this would have been much more fun and more informative and earned a better review."

Great Rock N Roll Doomsday Tour free on ibooks

The Great Rock N Roll Doomsday Tour is now showing up as a free ebook on ibooks for all you lovely people with shiny ipods and ipads.

This is because I made it free on Smashwords I presume, but I didn't do anything to pass that information on to iBooks, so they must trawl the free books on Smashwords to keep their pricing current.

Anyhow, it's now available and free, so catch it while you can.

Slightly overpriced

Last night I was surprised to find two listings on Amazon.com for two of my printed books. A company called Origin were selling The Great Rock N Roll Doomsday Tour and The Sci Fi Freak's Guide To The Televisual Galaxy in hardback and paperback form for over $100 each! This is something of a retail markup since these are currently only available from lulu.com in these formats at not even a third of this price.
Now I happen to think that my work is pretty good. I very much enjoy writing it and reading it afterwards, but even I'm not going to suggest that it's worth a whopping $130.
I did complain to Amazon customer services who said that Origin are well within their rights to buy and sell my book at whatever price they wish on the Marketplace and therefore that's the end of it as far as they are concerned.
I also emailed Origin directly asking where they had bought the books that they were planning to sell at this ridiculous markup and they have not, as yet, responded.
Interestingly enough, however,  the listing for The Sci Fi Freak's Guide To The Televisual Galaxy has since disappeared as mysteriously as it appeared.

I don't have problems with people reselling my books and making money off them if they buy them legally in the first place and Origin do appear to have a very good feedback history, but the listing is really rubbish with no image, no description and this stupid price and I would hate to think that I was being linked to it through being the author.
I will give it another couple of days and then I might leave a review saying that I think it's wonderful, but people should look elsewhere on price.

Great Rock N Roll Doomsday Tour goes Free

In order to have something to announce this blog's arrival, I have today made one of my more ignored efforts on the Kindle free on Smashwords in all available formats. I have also informed Amazon that this is free there in the hope that this will make it free on the kindle shortly thereafter (it worked for New York City Legend which got over 2000 downloads after it was made free before Amazon put it back to its full price.